Fall Back

Fall is in the air! When I stepped outside with my pup this morning, the chill in the air seemed to give her a burst of energy because she ran the length of the fence at full speed, leaping like a gazelle over obstacles.

It hasn't frosted yet, my garden is still producing tomatoes, but it is autumn in the south, one of my favorite seasons.

Its more bittersweet now that I'm no longer a student. I miss shopping for school supplies and feeling that my empty notebooks are a clean slate and anything is possible for the new school year.

I can still enjoy wearing my favorite sweaters, tights, boots and mini skirts, but I don't have a classroom full of potential friends to impress with my sweet fall fashions.

I still get overly optimistic in the fall, and there is still a lot of wonderful things to enjoy: cuddling is better when its chilly out, cooking butternut squash soup, hot tea in the evenings, walking my dog without the heat, humidity, and mosquito that dominate summer....these are all great things.

I miss that clean slate feeling.

But! I shall channel my bummed, stuck, bitterness over feeling as though I'm treading water, barely able to keep from going backwards let alone move forward, into writing, into the people I care about, and into making my house fall ready.

I try to convince myself that accomplishing small goals while maintaining my responsibilities will lead me to success, and I'm pretty gullible so I accept that logic, but I'm ready to start seeing some results from my attempts. I just need a shred of evidence that I'm on the right track to keep pushing my boulder up my mountain, but right now, its heavy and my arms are tired.

Not to end on a sour note, I'm alone in my house for a week and plan to "fall-ify" it with fun Pinterest projects and new curtains.